Post by { jayden weir ; on Feb 17, 2009 23:19:11 GMT -5
tell me you won't give up
mourning over a relationship wasn't something jayden would have normally done. not by a long shot. but course, the relationship with garret was probably the most intense relationship she'd ever been in, though that's probably not saying much now that she knew the whole story. the previous night, after the encounter she, garret, and miranda had over the campus chat box, she didn't know what to think anymore. she'd spent a majority of the night staying awake. honestly, it might have been the first time ever that she'd ever cried over a relationship. she honestly hadn't wanted the relationship to end, and she, honestly, blamed herself for it. if she hadn't avoided him...maybe they could have talked it all out, figured something out. instead, she ended up being a scared, stupid girl and avoided him since valentine's day. he'd been nothing but sweet to her, and just because of her stupid insecurities, she'd avoided the boy. now look where that led.
that morning when she'd woken up, she remembered that they had agreed to meet at the dining hall and 'talk'. she honestly wasn't sure on how that would turn out, and part of her was absolutely afraid to find out what would happen. she knew it was over between her and garret; before she'd even left the campus chat she knew it. what was she hoping for now? friendship? that was a laugh, really. could they really? well....there was the definitely possibility. she just wasn't sure if he would give her that chance. sure, he blamed himself, but he couldn't possibly comprehend how crappy she was feeling about herself at the moment.
getting out of bed, she went over to the mirror to see how she looked. she almost scared herself; she looked awful. wasted sleep obviously didn't do the girl any good. her eyes looked strained, as though it were a miracle she could keep them open for even a minute. the slight dark circles under her eyes were prominent than they ever were, which was quite odd because she usually didn't have really dark circles under her eyes. no sleep affected her a lot. going towards the bathroom, she washed her face, hoping that it would make her look somewhat alive. anyone who looked at her at that moment would think she was a living corpse.
after she brushed her teeth, she went back to her bedroom. changing out of her pajamas that she had changed into for no absolute reason, she changed into better looking clothes, but not much better. tying her hair back so tha tit was in a messy bun on the top of her head, she sat down on her couch, pulling her feet up underneath her. she had about an hour before she had to go meet garret at the dining hall. a part of her, a really big part of her, didn't know if she should go. she really didn't want to, but she knew that they had to talk it out. in person. not over a stupid campus chat box. she sighed, hugging her knees closer. she felt almost safe, just hiding up in he apartment. but she knew she'd have to go.
glancing at her clock, she saw it was nine thirty. sighing, she stood up, grabbing her bag. she was certain that after this she wasn't coming back to her apartment for a bit. maybe she'd go....she wasn't sure yet. she just didn't want to come back to her empty apartment too soon. grabbing her keys, she pulled her coat off the coat rack and pulled it on as she closed the door behind her. making sure that it was locked, she walked down the stairs slowly, pulling her hood over her head.
on the ten minute walk to the dining hall, she let her mind relax a bit. she might have been over rationalizing the whole thing, which she thought was likely. she wasn't sure. she had a feeling that if she talked to garret, things would be cleared up a bit at least. that's all she was hoping for at the moment. some closure to this. she looked up and was genuinely surprised to see she'd reached the dining hall. opening the door, she glanced at the clock on the wall. she had ten minutes before garret came so they could talk. walking in, she dropped her bag on a table near the back. she walked up to the counter and asked the woman for her normal coffee. the woman gave her a friendly smile, but jayden's return smile was only half hearted. paying her in full, she took the warm cup in her hands as she walked back to the table. sitting down, she crossed her legs as she took a sip. now to wait it out until he came....part of her prayed he didn't bring kaylee along. she wouldn't be able to face him if he bought that little girl with him. she toyed absent-mindedly with the necklace around her neck, not even bothering to remember it was the one garret gave her on valentine's day...
tag! garret
word count! 852
outfit! clickyy
music! save you by simple plan
misc! haha. rushedd
